|King K. Rool|
I've been waiting a long time for this moment.
—King K. Rool
WAAH AH AH AH AH AH AAH! WAAH AH AH AH AH AH AAH! WAAH AH AH AH AH... AAH! WAAH AH AH AH AH AH AAH! WAAH AH AH AH AH AH AAH! WAAH...
—King K. Rool (Donkey Kong 64)
King K. “Pussy Destroyer” Rool (a.k.a. Kinky Rool) is a character originating from Donkey Kong Country for the Super Nintendo and is one of the most requested characters on the GameFAQs Super Smash Bros. for Wii U board. He's also the most popular choice for a Donkey Kong rep in general, with Dixie Kong in 2nd place. Post release, he's the most wanted newcomer.on the board.
He's also the most popular choice for a DLC newcomer in Japan, which would be cool, but Pichu is more popular than he is. Pichu.
July 29, 2015, a King K. Rool Mii Fighter costume was confirmed for the upcoming update. Press F to pay respects.
A few fans had hope that this meant nothing. Not quite Ridley-level (that was more the Wolf group), though, but still. "Turns out it meant that we're not getting him. Maybe next time?" Is what we would've said if he wasn't KONFIRMED for Smash ultimate by now.
SURPRISE, IT'S AN ULTIMATE NEWCOMER
On August 8th, 2018, King K. Rool officially joined Smash, along with Simon and a few clones. This proceeded to blow up the board yet again.
The Totally Legit Timeline of K. RoolEdit
Super Dong AdventuresEdit
King K. Rool first appeared in Super Dong Adventures. He made the order to invade Dankey Kang's Ass and steal his Fried Chicken. His Rapper sex slaves carried out the orders, fucking at night. Will Smith fucked up and 50 Cent raped him to death, tossing his body into the ocean. Dankey Kang awoke the next day to find the chicken and his fuck buddy dead. DK vowed to revive his pal, get his chicken back and smoke weed everyday.
The niggas proved to be too pimptastic for K. Rool's sex slaves; eventually, K. Rool returned to the ghetto and had a rap battle with Dankey Kang and Will Smith (who was revived through the power of funk) in his own crack house, K. Rool's Pimp-ass Crack House. The battle was quite pimptastic, and K. Rool used many tactics to fend off the Niggas. He used his crown sex toy, crotch lasers, dong transformations and balls, even smoked weed, but ultimately was out pimped. This was not the last of his pimpatude. According to the XXXBox 420 remake of Super Dong Adventures, after the battle the Niggas started to get high, only to get raped by K. Rool himself, and the pimp-ass motherfucker had to go now, because his planet needed him.
Super Dong LandEdit
The good ol Pussy Destroyer returned in Super Dong Land, the Gay Boy successor to Super Dong Adventures. His involvement is the result of a bet between Cranky Kong, Dankey Kang and Will Smith. Cranky claimed DK and Will couldn't fuck a million bitches in three days, and so he calls up K. Rool and demands he return to the ghetto and re-steal Dankey Kang's fried chicken, because he's a fucking asshole.
Once again, the Niggas prove their pimpatude and defeat the Rappers. K. Rool himself is not fought in his crack house this time around, rather on a flying dong above the Big Rape City. His pimp-ass attacks were for the most part the same as before, with the addition of a semen beam attack. Dankey Kang and Will Smith out pimp him once more and win their bet.
Super Dong Adventures 2: Waluigi’s RevengeEdit
In Super Dong Adventures 2: Waluigi's Revenge, K. Rool is no longer the main asshole. In this game, that title belongs to Waluigi but K. Rool is AN asshole. to accommodate the new weed theme, he goes under the alias of Snoop Dogg. Snoop Dogg invades Dankey Kang's ass once again, arriving via his pimp car, The Pimpmobile. The Rappers kidnap Martian Luther King jr who was inside Dankey Kang's ass for some reason, leaving a ransom note demanding the Fried Chicken, and return home to Redd White's Gay Bar.
After discovering that Martain Lurther Kinect Jar has been kidnapped, even though he's dead, Will Smith,his girlfriend Disco Kid and the Niggas (but not Dankey Kang because he died from a heart attack off screen) rush off to Redd White's Gay Bar. Will Smith and Disco Kid explore the bar, triumphing over Snoop Dogg's sex slaves and murder Redd White, eventually reaching Snoop Dogg's Special VIP Lounge. They finally find the big ape at the top floor, only to have the macdaddy bring MK away and retreat to his Pimpmobile. In the Gaystation 69 version of Super Dong Adventures 2, K. Rool also sends the gigantic Fagget Mecha White to rap battle Will Smith and Disco Kid. The Niggas manage to reach Snoop's airship with the help of Cawks the Rainbow Dick Bird. Snoop Dogg was not expecting them, and was rapeing Martin Luther King jr.
Snoop Dogg is ready for rap, however, with his new Dongcannon 3000 (TM). This strange fleshlight can function not only as a sex toy, but also a gun that fires giant hairy sweaty balls in different fashions, and it slices, it dices, it cooks, it cleans, it can even rape babies! What's not to love? The macdaddy can also turn invisible, because fuck you!. Will and Disco manage to defeat Snoop by rapeing him. Mega MLK breaks free of the techno dongs that held him and uppercuts K. Rool out of this dimension, sending him crashing into the retarded rainbow rapist rivers of Rainbow Road.
However, shit happens.
The Niggas get high, and watch a lot of shit happen. However, just before the universe implodes, a dong is seen moonwalking away and Waluigi's laughter is heard. He moonwalkes off into the horizon never to be seen again.
Super Dong Land 2:Fuck YooEdit
Dong land Q1 is a retelling of Litlle Red Cock Riding Hood for the Gay Boy. Snmppp rapes The big bad wolf and Jesus gets high as shit an shit an shit. And shit! Bob the builder demands the Fried Chicken because KFC hates gay construction workers named Bob. Disco kidee and Will smithS travel through tim Allen ass to find the meaning of life and confront Snoop doddgge dog dod once more on the Your moms ass. Snoop dogs's dick still shoots lasors bitchpattern is a Jim bo agresioveov pizza fuck face version of his amazing techno rape in Super Dong Adventures 2; his armpitsnow shoots gusts of wind instead of the big ass balls or grasssss.
Fic hhhd McGee is also featured in Your moms ass, and thus so is the secret rap battle with God. 50 Cent is now harder to rape, requiring all 69 Fucks to give, but once that is fucked, he allows rapegy to the All the everything ever. In the ruins of Redd whites limp dick, God's rap battle is like the Other one inn hllleone; his gun launches igbehairyyballs, both normal and fucked varieties, and after a while Santa dies oh wait NO HE FUCKINH DOSN't YOU ASS BITCH CUS HE AINT RELE BITCH CITB GO EAT A BABY DICK!!!!!. When that I rape a babyll is tossed inside fuckn, it will cause his dicks (all ten thousand of them) to explode, launching him into the portal to hell, AND THEN ALL THE NIGGAS GOT HIGH THE END!!!!.
Super Dong Adventures 3: Dongs in SpaceEdit
In Super Dong Adventures 3: Dongs in Space, King K. Rool was seemingly replaced as Macdaddy of the Rappers by KOCK, a robotic pimp. Under KOCK's rule, the Rappers proceeded to take over Michael Jackson's Ass and rape the Rainbow Dong Bitch, as well as several of her children.
Eventually, after a long search for the recently vanished Dankey Kang (whose alive again for some reason) and Will Smith, Disco Kid and his long lost twin brother's second cousin twice removed Sonic the Hedgehog reached KOCK's techno crack house, KOCK'S KRAZY KRACK KABEN. Entering KOCK'S KRAZY KRACK KABEN, Disco Kid and Sonic encountered and began to rap battle KOCK, who was determined to rape them. It was only after they raped KOCK that Kid and Sonic discovered that KOCK (who was a football player BTW) was nothing but a dildo controlled by King K. Rool, this time under the alias of John Madden. After Kid and Sonic discovered him, John Madden began to rap battle the Niggas, using a helicopter football on his dick to save Christmas to send blasts of semen across the world. In order to rape John Madden, Disco Kid and Sonic would need to jerk off a particular dong on the ceiling of Your Mom, while avoiding John Madden and his football demons. Jerking off this dong would cause the universe to start dancing, which would cause John Madden to die from a sudden heart attack.
After John Madden's death, the body of KOCK turns into a bong. And then the niggas got high (also Dankey Kang and Will Smith were rescued, but who gives a shit?)
Super Dong Land 3:I'm TiredEdit
In Fuck You I'm a Super Star 33, John Madden and the Rappers die THE END!!!
Add yourself or others you know to this list if you or they are King K. Rool fans.
- PT Piranha
- K. Rool's fanbase is so infamously vocal that some of them have transcended Smash and hate on the Donkey Kong Country Returns games for not including him. Granted, he was a regular in the original games, the villains of the two recent ones are both based on him, and his last appearance was in a Mario spinoff title, so it's not exactly a crazy thought that Donkey Kong fans would want the original villain to return. He is also the the series answer to Bowser and the fact that those bastards at retro studios have NEVER explained why they decided to not include him doesn't help. (The last game where he was the main antagonist was DK Jungle Climber released in 2007 while his last physical appearance prior to Ultimate was in Mario Super Sluggers of all games released in 2008.)
- K. Rool's first name was actually his last name which is the same name as the woman's first name which he was married to, until they were divorced after the blame for Krystal's script in Star Fox Assault causing his entirety of his last name to be private but leaving only the first word of the last name and he moved his last name to be as his first name.
- The K stands for Keith.
- King Keith Rool is the true winner of the ballot.